Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)
…But you have heard of me!
THE SUMMARY: A rogue pirate captain helps a young blacksmith win the governor’s daughter and lift the curse that immortalized his former crew in a perfectly lovable action-adventure. It follows traditional, classic plot themes, but the characters are endearing, the writing is witty, the costuming is excellent, and the story doesn’t overcomplicate.
NO MOVIE-PICKER COMMENTARY: Listener Ross’ nomination list was rejected by the vote last week, so this movie was a random selection from IMDb’s top 250 list.
THE BEST:
A decent blend of all the genres: Most of the time, I’m not a fan of movies that try to do everything, as in action, comedy, romance, and all the other genres in one. It usually produces an unfocused, schizophrenic movie that doesn’t do any one particular thing well. Black Pearl is on a short list of exceptions. It’s tense (see the swordfighting), it’s funny (see the rum burning), at least for certain audiences it’s slightly scary (see the reveal of the undead pirate crew), and in each of these ways it’s enjoyable. I wouldn’t say Black Pearl is a top movie for me in any of these categories individually, but it is hard to pull them all off in a way that doesn’t produce cringe and contradiction. For a do-all movie, it’s done quite well.
Right to the action, minimal romance backstory: I appreciate that Black Pearl doesn’t waste time trying to sell me on Will and Elizabeth’s romance with some lengthy backstory about why he loves her and she loves him. She’s hot, he likes her because she’s hot, good enough. Get to the swordfights and the piracy, and the movie does. What little backstory there is is appropriately focused on the origin of the curse, not some sappy origin of their love. Good.
Great costuming - especially the teeth: Black Pearl’s costuming and makeup are particularly excellent. The pirate characters look authentic in a gross, grimy way. In the video below, the production crew members use the term ‘texture’ to describe their desired look, and that is the key to every piece. The teeth are the the biggest factor in making the pirates look legitimately rotten - those were specialty mouthpieces. The costumes were actually thrown in a concrete mixer with bricks to give them their rough, torn look. Ragetti’s wooden eye is a specialty contact lens, an effect that contributes not only to the rough pirate aesthetic, but the physical comedy as well. I won’t forget the fork eye. I appreciate that the movie didn’t aim for ‘cute’ with its pirate characters. It aimed for disgusting men of disease and violence.
Great backhand: Barbossa’s backhand on Elizabeth when she reveals she is not Turner’s daughter is great form. It’s also a gesture you don’t commonly see in movies anymore because it’s ‘sexist’ and ‘abusive,’ which is exactly the point for villainous antics.
THE WORST:
A fairly predictable, generic plot: An ostensibly unqualified but charming young man loves a high-society woman in distress who needs saving, which he achieves with the help of an eclectic sidekick. It’s a generic plot that can describe dozens of movies including this one, so if you’re looking for story originality, you may not find a thrill in this one.
However, there is a certain enjoyment in a movie that sticks to a proven formula and keeps it simple to follow. As a frequent critic of movies that ‘trust their audiences’ with ambiguous stories that require the viewer to infer or assume details, I won’t be overly critical of a movie that simplifies and explicitly presents its story. My point here is more of a possible or hypothetical criticism, rather than one I personally hold strongly. My philosophy on movies is I want to hear a good story, not imagine one myself. Black Pearl does that in a predictable, comfortable way.
Minimal moral or philosophical dilemma: Movies that earn my highest marks generally present a moral or philosophical dilemma that keeps me thinking for hours or days after I watch it. Black Pearl doesn’t. It’s doesn’t make you think, and it isn’t intended to, with only a few exceptions in the scripting. One moment of philosophizing happens when Jack and Will set out to rescue Elizabeth. Jack tells Will his dad was a pirate, Will objects, and challenges Jack to fight fairly. Jack responds that the only rules are what a man can do and what he can’t do, and exploiting those limitations to your advantage.
It’s an interesting moment of thought in the action, but it doesn’t ever go anywhere. Jack continues as a pirate who breaks the rules. Will continues as a man of honor who strives to do the right thing. Perhaps the viewer is supposed to observe value in both approaches, or the combination of them, but I don’t think there’s that much thought intended. They’re just contrasting characters for entertainment’s sake, and that’s fine, because it’s entertaining.
A FINAL NOTE: Until now, I had never seen a Pirates of the Caribbean movie, but I have ridden the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland. Not knowing any better, I just assumed the ride was based on the movie franchise. In fact it’s the opposite - the ride has been a piece of the park since 1967, and the movies are based on the ride. If cultural competence is the point of the movie bit, I have now reduced the items on my list of foolish misconceptions about movies by one.
THE RATING: 4/5 Wickies. Good for a thrill. Good for a laugh. Good for aesthetics and action. Good for a reminder that there’s nothing wrong with the classic damsel-in-distress story. After all, if we had more strong men saving more worthy women, it’d be a good thing.
YOUR RATING: Vote here ⬇
NEXT WEEK: The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014). This is the last selection from listener Ross’ January nominations.
AFTER THAT? YOU PICK - VOTE! Since January is a five-Sunday month, we have an extra slate of nominations to close the month - this time the nominations are from my lovely wife Ping Two. This abbreviated list is good for one week and one week only, so choose wisely.
Want to be the movie nominator for the month? Here’s how - fill out the form below.