The Princess Bride (1987)
As you wish.
THE SUMMARY: A sick boy’s grandfather visits to read him the story of a commoner-turned-princess and her quest to regain true love with her long-lost farm boy. A good movie if you’re one for wholesomeness, dry humor, and well-choreographed sword fights, but the plot is too predictable for me to give higher marks.
FROM MOVIE-PICKER ADAM: Inconceivable! Who doesn't enjoy this throwback classic - in a time when men had honor, women were strong yet feminine, and movies were actually funny. Sit back and enjoy this timeless classic while you contemplate the sacrifices made for love and revenge.
The sword fight
THE BEST:
The sword fight stands out: The sword fight scenes were impressive in performance, choreography, scripting, and use of space and set. Watching the duel between Montoya and ‘Dread Pirate Roberts’ (Westley), I was impressed that the actors performed the swordplay themselves and didn’t use stunt doubles or some other type of production enhancement (at least for the sword fighting, that is - they did use a gymnast to do the flips). Plus the dialogue during the scene is great - I was laughing as they described the respect they have for each other and the great regret each man will have in killing the other.
A couple of highly relevant lines: There were a few bits of writing that caught my attention as something to think about - one a broad life lesson of importance, and the other just a momentary observation that happens to be highly relevant currently.
The first line happens when Westley as Dread Pirate Roberts has Princess Buttercup captive. She accuses him of mocking her pain, and he delivers what is, in my opinion, the best line in a well-written script: Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something. Ain’t that the truth? We’ve been following the words of snake-oil salesmen promising relief from all of life’s dangers for far too long, and it’s not leading to prosperity or even relief. It’s only leading to stuffed salesman pockets.
The second line happens when Fezzik warns Montoya about pursuing the man in black/Westley: You be careful. People in masks cannot be trusted. Obviously, I acknowledge the writers had no concept of coronavirus or what that line might mean 35 years later, but can we remind ourselves of this general truth? Masks do not signify safety or security - they signify treachery. Just like everything else in the modern upside-down, we’ve inverted reality, and we do the opposite of what the wise giant man tells us. We only trust the masked, and somehow the unmasked have become the villains.
Life is pain, highness.
Don’t trust the masked.
A movie everyone can enjoy: Even if it’s not a perfect movie for me, I can recognize a movie that will generally appeal to almost all audiences. Children can find enjoyment in the classic prince, princess, and adventure story, and adults can find enjoyment in the movie’s excellent and clever writing. I don’t necessarily love this movie, but it’s hard for me to imagine strongly hating it.
THE WORST:
Some characters can get annoying: If anything is hatable in this movie, there are a few characters who can get grating. Vizzini, the Sicilian criminal leading the abduction of Princess Buttercup, has that Gilbert Gottfried or Fran Drescher-style voice that can be hard to listen to in the longer scenes. I also thought Billy Crystal’s ‘Old Man Max’ character (the old man healer) was irritating. I suppose that’s the point of each character, Vizzini in that he’s a villain and isn’t supposed to be purely likable, and Old Man Max in that he and his wife annoy each other for comedic effect, but I was just waiting for each guy’s scenes to end.
Completely obvious plot: It’s not that the story is poorly written - the dialogue in particular is excellent - but in general, every ‘twist’ in the story was completely obvious and predictable. It was apparent from the initial close shots of ‘Dread Pirate Roberts’ that he is ‘Farm Boy’ Westley in disguise. Prince Humperdink’s defeat is the inevitable movie ending all along. Westley and Buttercup together in the most ‘passionate and pure’ kiss of all time is how you know the movie will end just by watching the opening scene.
Maybe I’m missing something - maybe Westley’s obvious disguise is for some purpose, though that doesn’t explain why Buttercup isn’t able to recognize him. Maybe I’m mistaking ‘obviousness’ for ‘classic-ness’ in story telling, and there’s nothing wrong with telling a classic story (indeed, that’s the point of the movie - Grandpa telling a classic story to his grandson). But I like a movie that surprises me, and makes me think. This isn’t that.
THE RATING: 3/5 Wickies - an enjoyable classically-themed family movie without wasted time, but not much surprising or interesting enough for me to want another viewing.
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NEXT WEEK: Reservoir Dogs (1992)
AFTER THAT? YOU PICK - VOTE! January’s movie nominations are selected by listener Adam.
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