Enemy at the Gates (2001)
I will get his rifle for you - I promise!
THE SUMMARY: Very fittingly this week, we watch some Russian propaganda. A scrappy Red Army soldier faces off against an accomplished Wehrmacht marksman, and the two chase each other through the Battle of Stalingrad until the commie takes out the fascist. It’s a great, though highly dramatized, sniper duel based on a real person and a real historical event. I haven’t watched it for at least 15 years - upon review, there’s too much awkward romance and not enough warfare, but it’s still a worthy watch about what may be the bloodiest and deadliest battle in world history.
FROM MOVIE-PICKER ME: Alongside Black Hawk Down, Enemy at the Gates was one of my brother’s favorite war movies. Playing Call of Duty together, we’d often quote Vasily Zaitsev in this movie to get revenge on enemy players: ‘I will get his rifle for you - I promise!’ At one point, we used the gamertags ‘Ghost of Zaitsev,’ referencing this movie, and ‘Ghost of Shughart,’ referencing Green Beret Medal of Honor recipient Randy Shughart of Black Hawk Down fame. In addition to being a great war movie, Enemy at the Gates has a deep personal meaning in my memory.
JAMIE AND JEANNE’S AI FACESWAPS:
Hey, it’s better than being a commie.
I guess I did well at the bread line.
Blonde’s great grandpa, maybe.
Early life check on this one.
THE BEST:
It’s kind of a real story: At least in the West, our World War II attention tends to focus on the European and North American opposition to the Germans. But Stalingrad was a battle far longer and costlier than those. At least in its broadest premises, Enemy at the Gates is a real story within that carnage and devastation. Vasily Zaitsev is credited with some 265 confirmed German kills and was awarded Hero of the Soviet Union, the highest Russian military distinction equivalent to our Medal of Honor. His German enemy Erwin König was at least reportedly real - he’s not known in German records, but he is part of Zaitsev’s memoirs. Zaitsev said their battle took place over three days, and he later met König’s daughter. Tania Chernova was a real female Soviet sniper from Zaitsev’s sniper school, and the two were romantically involved.
Chick hysteria doesn’t belong in war: After König arrives, he starts eliminating Zaitsev’s snipers - among them, Ludmilla, a woman who goes hysterical when the moment gets chaotic, and disobeys Zaitsev’s commands to stay calm and still. Her panicked reaction immediately brings a German round to her brain.
I get it - it was Stalingrad. And there were a lot of women fighting in Stalingrad, actually. I’m not saying the premise is inaccurate. I’m saying we shouldn’t choose to put women in combat roles. It’s not effective, it’s against their nature, and it’s downright cruel.
I forgot Ron Perlman was in this movie, but he’s actually pretty good: I can’t stand Ron Perlman, the guy. He has some of the most insanely ridiculous Twitter takes of all time. Right up there with Keith Olbermann in the Hall of Lolcow Fame. And they strangely share a urine fixation. But Perlman is solid in this movie. His metal-mouthed character is great, as is his clever explanation for how it happened: ‘well there wasn’t a sickle, but there was a hammer.’ Plus his death was likewise epic.
A commie’s dying realization: When Perlman’s character Koulikov is explaining his metal teeth, he says ‘that’s the land of socialism and universal bliss for you.’ But Commisar Danilov’s final moments are even more honest about the communist truth: ‘we tried so hard to create a society that was equal. Where there’d be nothing to envy your neighbor. But there’s always something to envy. A smile. A friendship. Something you don’t have and want to appropriate. In this world, even a Soviet one, there will always be rich and poor.’ It’s a shame to confront this reality only upon death. Wise up beforehand - men exist as God made them, not as man wants them to be.
It was influential on Call of Duty: Enemy at the Gates’ fountain scene was largely recreated in the 2008 Call of Duty game World at War - the player awakens laying in a fountain with German soldiers shooting fallen Soviets. Just like the movie scene, the player must coordinate with an NPC to snipe his way out of it.
This Call of Duty scene might actually be more of a direct ripoff than just innocent influence, but clearly Enemy at the Gates was inspirational for the video game series that would explode to become one of the most popular of all time.
A commie's dying confession.
Do you know how to shoot?
THE WORST:
It’s not that real of a story: Beyond its general premises though, Enemy at the Gates takes many creative liberties to wild inaccuracy. The famous charge scene where only every other man gets a rifle and the other is to follow him with ammo is a complete fiction. It fits the commie shortage theme, but according to a Battle of Stalingrad historian, that tactic never happened. Likewise, while there was a ‘not one step back’ order for the Red Army, there’s no evidence that machine gunners were deployed to shoot their own men who attempted to retreat. There were ‘barrier troops,’ however, whose job it was to apprehend retreating soldiers and send them back.
The sex scene is hideously awkward: The romance is lame and nobody cares - get back to the sniping. But good God, the sex scene in the barracks is painful. It starts with a weird handy. The acting is awful as they seize up like they’re having a stroke. You keep waiting for someone around them to notice what they’re doing. And worst of all, it goes on and on for three-plus minutes. Almost three percent of this movie is this freaking sex scene. Just bust and get back to the battle, dude. Or better yet, make it tasteful with a kiss and fade to end scene, so we know they did without having to watch it.
The ‘trapped’ scene is preposterous: The scene where König has Zaitsev trapped in the warehouse building is silly. Zaitsev has cover behind some flimsy piece of furniture, König can see he’s stuck and disarmed behind it, and König doesn’t just shoot him through the obstacle? Why not? Is it made of titanium?
Then Tania shows up and somehow ‘blinds’ König with a light reflection, as though he couldn’t possibly endure the torture of a slightly bright light from hundreds of feet away, and Zaitsev quick-scopes him, as though Zaitsev has the time to pick up, aim, and fire his rifle from the shoulder accurately before König would blow his brains out like he did to everyone else. Most preposterously, Zaitsev shoots König in the hand with a 7.62 round, and König’s hand isn’t turned to hamburger. Instead he just has a tiny puncture wound, puts a bandage on it, and is just fine to get back out there for more precision shooting.
The one with the rifle shoots.
Who knew the Battle of Stalingrad could have been won with light reflection from glass shards?
THE RATING: 4/5 Wickies. I didn’t enjoy it quite as much as I did in my memory - too much romance bullshit and not enough action - but it’s still a unique and influential movie about perhaps the harshest battle in the history of the world.
YOUR RATING: Vote here ⬇ Note: if you get a notification saying you have already voted and you haven’t, this is because of an issue with iOS (Apple mobile devices). Try voting on a desktop or laptop computer.
NEXT WEEK: Network (1976). Network is a random selection from IMDb’s top-250 list, after the rejection of the nominees in last week’s vote. It currently ranks #231.
AFTER THAT? YOU PICK - VOTE! This is the last week to vote on September’s nominations from listener Nick. Next week the list will reset for October.
As a reminder, in addition to Nick’s picks, Matt and Blonde have both submitted one movie each, but you won’t know who nominated which movie until a movie is selected. Matt’s September pick Enemy at the Gates was selected, but Blonde’s remains on the board. Note: if you get a notification saying you have already voted and you haven’t, this is because of an issue with iOS (Apple mobile devices). Try voting on a desktop or laptop computer.
Want to be the movie nominator for the month? Here’s how - fill out the form below. Note: once you are entered, you are eligible for selection on an ongoing basis. One entry per participant - multiple entries will be rejected.