The Godfather (1972)
Goddamn FBI - don’t respect nothin’!
THE SUMMARY: A mob boss rejects a drug deal, so his rivals shoot him up and kill his firstborn son, but his youngest kills the drug kingpin and the rest of the mob bosses and assumes the namesake role. It’s an okay movie buried in an extra 90 minutes of sheer boredom. Too many characters and irrelevant plot points dilute the movie’s potentially interesting moral dilemmas. It’s a dull, slow story of degeneracy disguised as virtue.
FROM MOVIE-PICKER DRACULLAMA: A man does what he must to provide for his family. One of the best movies of all time! Sometimes violence is thrust upon a man and he must choose to rise to the occasion to protect the ones he loves and secure a future for his family. This is a 5-Wicky or you're gay.
THE BEST:
In presentation, it holds up very well: Aside from a few hilariously overacted deaths (see the baptism murder scene at the end), the visuals of the movie look almost on par with today’s, 50 years later. I don’t find enjoyment in the story or the characters, but I can respect a movie that holds up in its production as much as this one does.
References galore: If understanding movie references is the original purpose of the bit, The Godfather’s must me acknowledged. There’s the famous horse head in bed, there’s the even more famous ‘offer he can’t refuse’ line, but even politically, the movie was highly relevant only a few years ago when a guy confronted Chris Cuomo and called him Fredo, and Cuomo said that’s the Italian equivalent of the N word, and later apologized. Even if it was long and boring, the viewing made me more movie literate, and that is the original point.
Some decent family philosophy sprinkled in: Even though I can hardly understand any of Vito’s mumbled raspy lines, I understood the most important one: ‘a man who doesn’t spend time with his family can never be a real man.’ I have my disputes with the way the Corleones ‘protect’ each other, but I can respect the spirit of the philosophy. The rite of passage into manhood isn’t physical strength. It isn’t intelligence. It isn’t wealth. All of these things are important, but only to the extent they serve family. Forgo fatherhood, and all of its pursuits, and forgo the ultimate achievement of manhood. There is no substitute.
Was that actually a bomb, or just a chick driver?: Though the movie has its semi-surprising deaths, the only one I didn’t see coming at all was the car bombing of Michael’s Italian wife Apollonia. But it’s fair to question: given the driving practice earlier, was this actually a mob hit that got the wrong target, or was it just a chick trying to drive a manual?
A wakeup surprise
An offer he can’t refuse
A woman tries to drive a manual
THE WORST:
Supremely boring and slow: File this one under three hour movies that could be half as long. Mob boss gets into trouble, guys get killed, more guys get killed in revenge, done. Instead we have to see a drawn out Sicily side story, domestic violence between Carlo and Connie that’s only relevant in that it gets Sonny killed but takes too long to get there, painfully slow inter-mob politics about the drug business, and other inventive ways to make gang warfare somehow boring. Less talking, more Tommy guns. Angels with Filthy Souls did it better.
Way too many characters creates a lack of focus: The Godfather is fundamentally Michael’s story from little brother to Don, but there are so many characters and plot pieces that’s not immediately apparent. It doesn’t take fifty mob guys to make a good gangster movie. Pick one and focus. The Godfather’s Wikipedia page lists about thirty characters. I bet even the biggest fan of this movie can’t name half of them from memory, because nobody can keep track of that much noise.
A jumping timeline that’s hard to follow: The movie covers a decade’s time, and jumps ahead within that decade, often without explicitly noting the jumps. In combination with too many characters and a convoluted, slowly developing plot, it also makes for a movie that’s just tough to keep track of. Watching it is constantly asking ‘who is this?,’ ‘what is he doing?,’ ‘when is this happening?’ etc. A three hour production that requires a few rewinds even for the attentive viewer is exhausting.
Violence is not thrust upon the Corleones - they choose it throughout: Normally I wouldn’t directly challenge a point from the movie nominator, but since he’s calling me gay if I disagree, I must indulge. The Corleones are not reluctant with violence. They are a crime family, and they initiate criminal aggression throughout. Vito killed a guy’s prized horse over a movie role dispute. Michael murdered the other family Dons even after a truce, while hijacking the church for an alibi and moral credibility. These moves and others were not defensive or responsive in nature - they were aggressive moves in pursuit of power, nothing more.
I get the point of the movie isn’t necessarily to sympathize with or have respect for the Corleones, only to understand them, but I don’t accept the premise that they are criminals by some sort of necessity, or that they only have to do these things because of what others have done to them. They are criminals by choice, and they’d abuse others regardless of how they are treated themselves. And because they are moral frauds, the Corleones don’t actually protect their family at all. They get several family members killed.
This isn’t a story of what a man must do to protect his family. This is a story of how a man destroys his family.
Michael chooses lots of violence
THE RATING: 2/5 Wickies. Way too long. Way too many characters. And way too little point. Peter Griffin was right, even if his phrasing was as pretentious as this movie. I award a bonus Wicky purely for its cultural relevance, not for my own enjoyment. I guess I had to see it in its era, or something. Considering its supposed status of second-greatest movie of all time, The Godfather isn’t just a criminal story. It’s criminally overrated.
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NEXT WEEK: Good Morning, Vietnam (1987)
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